A Trickster Distracted
by txfantasystar
Summary: When Loki falls he goes to Earth where he meets Thor's friends and what ensues isn't anything that he could have predicted. Post-Movie Ch5 is up
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Thor and company belong to Marvel, not me.

A/N: So, there's not enough Loki and Darcy stories and my friend told me to write one, so I started to. And now I'm posting it here.

A Trickster Distracted

Chapter One

* * *

><p>Loki waited until he was out of the sight of Thor and Father before slipping through the folds of the worlds. He was relieved when it worked, for the fall through the empty space below Asgard was disconcerting and his own power was drained. Loki used the last of it to slip through to another of the worlds, landing with a thump in the dusty desert that Thor had landed in when he had been banished only a short while ago.<p>

"Damn…" Loki cursed. He had hoped to not land on Midgard, but it looked as though those hopes were not to be answered. Loki sighed, guessing that he should try to make the most of it and brushing the dust from his clothing as he stood. He reached for his magic to heal the slight throbbing from the uncontrolled impact and was disappointed to see that his reservoirs were truly drained. It would take a while for them to be replenished in a realm with so little magic.

Loki cursed his luck again. He would never blend in in these garments and he couldn't change them right now. Loki squinted at the horizon as he saw a vehicle approaching through the dust it kicked up.

"Well, that's just great," he mumbled, crossing his arms and standing there. It wasn't as if he could go anywhere else and he could use a ride into some form of civilization. The van screeched to a halt a ways away and a small woman and tall man that he recognized from Thor's time on Midgard hopped out. "Of course," Loki mumbled as they ran towards him.

"Are you from Asgard?" the woman questioned as she took in Loki's appearance.

"Jane," the man admonished before she shushed him.

"Why do you feel the need to know?" Loki replied carefully.

"There was a small disturbance reminiscent of an Einstein-Rosen Bridge on this spot and you're standing here and—"

"Jane," the man said again, holding her back when she stepped towards him.

"I do not know what that means," Loki replied, taking in Jane's appearance carefully. He didn't see what the big deal was. He had no clue why Thor had _fallen_ for such a woman. But he did know that this was an opportunity to keep track of the Midgardian's progress on the Bifrost from this end, and it was one he couldn't pass up. "I am, however, from Asgard, as you previously asked."

"Tell me, do you know how Thor is?" she questioned, "I know he's only been gone for a week, but—"

"A week?" Loki interrupted, "It's been a week?" Apparently the slip between worlds had taken longer than he had thought. If he had been between the worlds for a week, then he had more catching up to do than he had anticipated. Although these Midgardians might not have made any progress.

"Yes. A week since Thor left," Jane replied, looking slightly confused.

"I…was lost between worlds for that time," Loki admitted, not wanting to deal with any more of her questions about a time that he didn't know of, "I left Asgard a mere hour after Thor's return."

"Oh," Jane replied, seeming to deflate on the spot before looking back up at him, "Well, you should come with us anyways. You won't fit in with the way you're currently dressed and you might have insight on the Einstein-Rosen Bridge phenomenon."

Loki nodded. "I would be very grateful if you could give me a place to stay, and perhaps some food if I have truly been lost between worlds for a week."

"As long as your appetite is less than Thor's, we have plenty for you to eat," Jane smiled as she led him back towards the van. She suddenly stopped and turned towards him again. "I'm sorry, but I didn't get your name?"

"Of course," Loki smiled at her with a small bow, "My name is Loki."

Loki hid a grin as her jaw dropped and she stepped away from him. "Loki? Thor's brother?"

"Of course," he replied as the man stepped between them.

"It's your fault, then, that Thor was almost killed and that he went back to Asgard in the first place!" Jane replied as she ducked around the man.

"Fault? No. Although much of it was my doing," Loki replied, "I never meant to kill my brother. I was simply helping him get his powers back." Jane glared at him and Loki smiled at her as he finished his lie.

"Why should we trust you?" Jane demanded.

"As you said, I'm your only connection to my home, Asgard. I may not be able to help you much as my power has been drained, but you must believe that I want to be able to get back there as much as you do. And the only way to do that is to rebuild the Bifrost, which was shattered during a…confrontation with some Frost Giants," Loki lied smoothly. He didn't currently have the power to travel between worlds himself, but his magic would more than likely be fully replenished before any progress was made on the Bifrost by these humans. "The Bifrost would surely be easier to rebuild on Asgard's end if it is also being worked on here," Loki added as an afterthought.

Jane and the man studied him intently before moving away to hold a hushed conversation Loki could still hear every word of.

"He's right, Erik, we need him," Jane said.

"He's untrustworthy, Jane. He's a trickster and we don't know him," Erik replied.

"Then we take him back to the compound and don't allow him to leave. I'm sure SHIELD can make sure of that. He admitted that his power is drained—"

"But how do we know that that's the truth. Jane?"

"We're just going to have to take it on faith, Erik. Keeping him in our sight is better than letting him lose on the public!"

Erik sighed. "Fine, Jane. But you have to keep an eye on him."

They came back over and Jane smiled at him. "We'll take you back to our research facilities. I'm sure you can stay in one of the extra rooms."

"I thank you, Miss Jane," Loki replied with another small bow. She smiled and giggled a little before opening the door to the vehicle and letting him climb in. Loki rolled his eyes as she turned her back to him. If all humans were this easy to charm, his stay here would be both entertaining and easy.

* * *

><p>Upon their arrival at the expansive compound (apparently humans could get a lot more done in a week than he had thought, as none of this had been here when Thor was), Loki was led to what Jane said was her lab and sat at a table in a room off of it. He said nothing as she brought him a sandwich from a supposed kitchen that he didn't see. Just as he was biting into the somewhat bland meal another girl walked in. This one he recognized as well.<p>

"Darcy, meet Thor's brother Loki," Jane said as the girl walked over.

"Did he fall from the sky too?" the girl questioned as she sat across from Loki at the small table. Loki swallowed down his bite of sandwich and glared at her.

Jane ignored Darcy's question. "He's staying here until we can figure out how to get into Asgard," she explained.

"Cool," Darcy replied, opening a bag of snack food, "So you do magic and stuff?" Jane rolled her eyes and left to go back into her lab area.

Loki looked back at Darcy and raised an eyebrow, taking another bite of his meal.

"In the legends, it says that you do magic," the girl said as she chomped quite loudly on her snack.

"I do," Loki replied carefully after a bit of silence, "but at this moment my powers are all gone. I used the last of them to get here instead of falling through nothingness for the rest of time."

"Oh," Darcy replied as she crumpled up the now-empty bag in her hands.

Loki nodded and finished his sandwich silently, glad to have had some sustenance, even if it was not very appetizing.

* * *

><p>He was given a small room down the hall from Jane, Erik, and Darcy. Loki thought it odd that they had him so close to themselves if they didn't trust him, but decided this must be part of the "keeping an eye on him" that they were doing. The room only held a twin-sized bed and a desk, but it had a bathroom attached, which he supposed was nice. He was also provided with some "normal" clothes by Darcy (who had apparently had to go out and buy them after his arrival) so that he could blend in with the Midgardians.<p>

The compound wasn't really all that exciting. It was just Jane, Erik, and Darcy plus a couple of "underling scientists" (Darcy's words, not his) hired by SHIELD and a bunch of SHIELD agents guarding the facility and looking very stoic as well as Agent Coulson, who seemed to be the one actually in charge. Loki was given a tour of the facilities and the town (which had been put back together by SHIELD after the incident with the Destroyer), which were both rather small. He was unimpressed, but he supposed that that would be the case with a lot of things here on Midgard.

The only thing that was actually interesting was the town library, where he found enough history books to educate himself on what he'd missed since the last time he'd been on Midgard (which was much longer ago than he had thought—between the two "World Wars" which had been impressively and disturbingly destructive).

He was in the library reading through a Norse Mythology book he had found (that was highly disturbing—he had never given birth to a horse, and if he had he wouldn't have let Father _ride_ it) when Darcy plopped down on the other side of the table. He'd been here almost two weeks now and this was only the third time he'd talked to her (the second having been the tour she gave him the second day he had been in this stupid town).

"What's up?" she asked, putting her feet up on the table.

Loki glared at them before pushing them off of the table with one of his fingers and going back to his book. "I am reading this absolutely _delightful_ book about my home," he replied sarcastically.

"Have you gotten to the one where you give birth to a horse?"

He glared at the girl and closed the book. "I don't understand how people created such messed up stories about my family," Loki replied, ignoring the twinge in his stomach at the thought of the people he called his family. He wondered if they still thought of him that way after all he'd done.

"What about the one where the dwarves sewed your mouth shut?" she asked with a grin.

Loki grimaced. "That one actually happened." And it had hurt.

Her smile fell a bit. "Oh. Sorry."

Loki waved the comment off and leaned back in his chair. "So why are you here?"

"Well," Darcy announced much louder than needed, "I decided that you were being kind of pathetic hanging out in here all alone all the time, so I decided it was time to make you less pathetic-like."

"How?" Loki questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"By taking you to do something remotely interesting," she replied.

Loki sighed and leaned forward into the table again. "Did Jane put you up to this?" he questioned, just out of curiosity. It seemed like something she'd do to make sure he wasn't getting up to trouble.

Darcy rolled her eyes and sighed, "She seems to think you might be getting up to trouble. I told her you just hung out in here like a loser all the time, but she insisted you were being devious."

"Of course. Because I have so many resources in this blip of a town," Loki replied. He really hated it here. And to make matters worse, his magical reservoirs were filling back up so slowly that he doubted they would be full again for another five months. Maybe more.

"Ooooookay, Mr. Depression," Darcy replied, standing and grabbing his arm to pull to his feet.

"Where are we going?" Loki questioned, resigned to letting her drag him along behind her. The less trouble he caused, the better.

"Bowling!"

* * *

><p>The "Bowling Alley" was a run-down building on the outskirts of town. The only people there besides him and an overly-excited Darcy were the employees, most of whom seemed half asleep. Darcy took some sort of fiendish pleasure in the grimace that crossed his face when she handed him some shoes and told him to put them on.<p>

"I already have shoes, Darcy. And these smell bad."

"Bowling rules, Loki. You have to wear bowling shoes," she replied with a grin as she put her own shoes on.

Loki sighed and sat next to her. "Do I have to?"

"Yes," Darcy replied, leaning over and pulling his shoes off. Loki sighed and put on the bowling shoes with a scowl. As soon as he was finished Darcy grabbed him by the elbow and dragged him over to a rack of what he assumed were bowling balls. He saw one of the guys behind the desk shoot him a sympathetic look and scoffed, pulling his arm out of Darcy's grip as they came to a stop. She took one of the bright green ones off the shelf and setting it in his hands. "Here ya go!"

"What exactly am I supposed to do with…this?" Loki questioned.

"It's bowling! You take the ball and you roll it at the pins at the end of the lane," she explained, pointing at a lane as she picked up a bowling ball for herself. She took hold of his arm again and dragged him to one of the lanes. "Stand here and I'll show you how to bowl," she ordered, standing him on the slightly slick wood floor by some weird mechanical contraption.

"What is that?" he asked, pointing at it.

She turned and looked at it. "The bowling ball comes back here into that after you roll it," she said before turning back around. "Now watch."

Loki sighed and watched as she threw the bowling ball down the lane. It rolled to the side and went back without knocking any pins over. "Is it supposed to go into the side like that?" he asked.

"Shut up. It's supposed to hit the pins on the end, but if you don't throw it right it goes into the gutter," she replied as the ball was spit back from the machine, causing Loki to jump. She picked it up and went back. "I throw one more time, and then you get two throws," she explained, "and we keep switching back and forth."

"And this is supposed to be fun?" Loki pondered.

She turned and glared. "Would you rather be stuck in the library all day reading stupid legends about Asgard?"

Loki considered this for a moment before sighing. "I do spend too much time in there with the books," he admitted.

"See?" she grinned, "Now have fun!" She turned and threw the ball down the lane again, this time knocking over a few of the pins. She grinned in triumph as she turned back towards him. "Your turn!"

Loki sighed and imitated Darcy to the best of his ability. He scowled as she laughed at him when the ball went into the gutter. "I don't see what's so funny," he complained.

She smiled, "I'm just glad that there's things you gods aren't good at," she replied, "although you still look disgustingly graceful while doing so." She handed him the bowling ball.

Loki sighed and went through the whole thing again, still confused as to how this could be considered fun. Again, it rolled right into the gutter.

Darcy grinned at him. "See? This is fun!"

Loki plopped down into one of the chairs, "How?"

She rolled her eyes and bowled her turn with an intense concentration that had her tongue sticking slightly out the corner of her mouth. The concentration apparently helped, as she knocked over all but one of the pins between her two tries. She turned back to him, fists thrust into the air in triumph.

"Congratulations," Loki drawled, "do you want a prize?"

"I haven't won yet," Darcy replied, handing his ball back to him, "but when I _do_ win, you can take me to the movies."

"Movies?" Loki questioned, grudgingly taking his turn at the stupid game.

"Yes," she replied, giggling when his ball went into the gutter, "it's a big live-action story on a giant screen."

"And I'm assuming that this would cost Midgardian money, which I don't have," Loki replied, still having not much of a clue what she was talking about, although he assumed that it was like the television he had seen Darcy and Jane watching once.

"Oh, I'll pay for it," Darcy replied, handing the bowling ball back to him and turning him back towards the lane, "you just have to come with me."

Loki sighed as he threw the ball into the gutter again. He could hit a tiny target a hundred feet away with a throwing knife, but he couldn't hit ten pins at the end of a bowling lane. It was embarrassing. "What's the point of making me take you if you're paying for it?"

"Company," Darcy replied simply, "I keep getting in Jane's way and I'm not smart enough to actually help with any of that physics crap, so I have to find ways to entertain myself. And you're kinda hilarious."

"I'm sure my company is endlessly amusing to you," Loki responded as he sat back down.

Darcy threw her ball down the lane with surprising precisian, knocking down all but the two back corner pins. "It's more your complete lack of knowledge of human culture."

"I know more that Thor did," Loki snorted, "I've actually visited Midgard before."

"Really?" Darcy asked as the ball came back, "When?"

"A few times. Most recently back before the Second World War…"

"Dude! That was forever ago. Sooooo much has changed since then," Darcy laughed before throwing the ball again, straight into the gutter.

"So I've noticed," Loki replied as Darcy pushed him at the lane again. He sighed and sent the ball down the lane again, grimacing as it rolled into the gutter inches before hitting an actual pin.

Darcy giggled at him again. "Seems like a god could hit some bowling pins," she teased.

Loke glared at her and retrieved the ball from the machine, tossing it down the lane again. Apparently he'd finally done something right, as it hit the pins straight on and they all fell over.

Loki blinked a few times as Darcy ran up next to him. "Holy crap. You totally did it," she said before punching him in the shoulder.

"Of course," Loki scoffed back as he stepped away from her, "I'm not a complete invalid."

Darcy stuck her tongue out at him as she went to start her turn.

"It's quite unseemly for a lady to do such things in public," Loki reprimanded, "Of course, you don't seem to be a lady."

Darcy turned back to him and stuck up her middle finger. Loki blinked.

"Is that…supposed to mean something?"

"Dude. You're sooooo behind," she replied without explanation. She rolled the ball down the lane without paying much attention, hitting the gutter.

"You humans are entirely confusing," Loki said quickly as she retrieved the ball, "Many of the things you do make no sense and the rest of it is ridiculously unintelligent."

She rolled it into the gutter again before turning to him. "Well, Jane is trying to create a wormhole-thing to get to Asgard."

"I didn't say that humans weren't intelligent, in fact many of you are smarter than my brother; I simply said you spend most of your time doing unintelligent things. Using your intelligence for stupid reasons."

"And what do you use your intelligence for?"

"All sorts of things. None of which I feel inclined to tell you," Loki replied.

Darcy rolled her eyes and shoved the bowling ball at him. Loki sighed and threw it down the lane the exact same way he had last time. Unsurprisingly, it knocked all the pins over again. Darcy scowled and picked her ball up.

"I thought we rolled it twice?" Loki questioned.

"You usually do. But if you knock all the pins down in the first try, it's a strike and it's the next player's turn."

"…this game makes no sense," Loki replied.

"It doesn't have to."

Loki blinked, "Then why play it?"

"As I told you, it's fun!" she grinned before throwing the ball.

"I don't see how…"

Unfortunately, by the end of the game Loki was having fun despite himself. Every time he rolled a strike she would glare at him, which was endlessly amusing. After the last ball she crossed her arms and glared.

"I'm guessing that means I won," Loki smiled.

"Yeah…" she replied glumly before brightening up, "Hey! You smiled!"

Loki quickly wiped the smile from his face, "I did no such thing."

"Yes you did!" Darcy replied happily, latching onto his arm again.

Loki scowled and pulled away. "I did not. Are we finished here?"

"I guess," Darcy replied with a pout.

Loki sighed. He much preferred it when Darcy was smiling to when she was pouting. Something about the fact that he had caused her to do so rubbed him the wrong way. "I'll still go to the movies with you," he offered.

She smiled. "Really?"

"Sure," Loki shrugged, "it can't be much worse than this."

Darcy hopped a little in what Loki assumed was joy and put the bowling ball into his hands. "We have to put these away and give the shoes back."

"Good," Loki replied, "I hate these shoes."

* * *

><p>AN: Please tell me what you thought!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Thor and company belong to Marvel, not me.

A Trickster Distracted

Chapter Two

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><p>As they left the bowling alley Darcy took his arm and pulled him in the opposite direction of the SHIELD base. "Where are we going?" Loki questioned as he stumbled a bit behind her—which he would later deny.<p>

"To the movies!" Darcy replied as Loki resituated himself beside her so he wouldn't be pulled along. She didn't let go of his arm.

"Right now?" Loki blinked.

"Got any other plans?" Darcy snorted.

Loki sighed, resigned to Darcy's semi-insanity. "No," he answered, "however, I would like to do more—"

"Reading? You've been reading for a week straight!" Darcy interrupted, "it's time to loosen up! Have fun!"

"Were you dropped on your head as a child? Repeatedly?" Loki wondered.

Darcy giggled in a way that could only confirm his question and pulled him towards the building ahead that proclaimed itself the town's Movie Theater. She linked her arm through his in a way that he wasn't unused to from Asgard and led him much less forcefully to a window. Loki didn't pay much attention as she ordered the tickets, simply catching that they were apparently going to see something called "Transformers."

Darcy then proceeded to drag him to another counter inside the building that smelled very odd. Loki didn't like it at all, but Darcy seemed thrilled as she let go of his arm to buy a large tub of what she called popcorn (which was what the smell was, he realized) and a very large cup of Dr. Pepper (which he had already become accustomed to as it was always around Jane's lab—he had tried some and thought the fizzing bubbles were entirely amusing and delicious). She handed both to him and pulled him towards a door down the right-hand aisle. Again, Loki noticed he was receiving sympathetic glances from on-looking male workers.

The theater was fairly empty and Darcy dragged him to a row behind a railing, which she put her feet up on, before grabbing the tub of popcorn from him. Loki gripped the drink in his hands and stared at the big, bright screen in front of them. It was really too big and Loki's eyes already felt sore just by looking at it. Currently, an advertisement for refreshments was running. Darcy turned towards him while munching on some popcorn. "I think you're gonna have a blast," she said.

"Really?"

Darcy nodded, "This movie's supposed to be full of explosions. The best form of entertainment, trust me."

Loki rose an eyebrow skeptically before turning back to the screen, sipping at the drink he was still holding in his hands. The cold condensation on the cup was quite soothing, he found.

"Aren't your hands cold?" Darcy questioned.

"Hmm?"

"The cup? Isn't it cold? Or are you Asgardians immune to things like that?"

"Oh," Loki replied, quickly setting the cup in the convenient holder between their seats, "Yes, it is. Quite cold." Loki still wasn't comfortable with reminders that he wasn't actually Asgardian, and she had just inadvertently done so (although it's not like she knew).

Darcy snorted. "Popcorn?" she offered.

"Um, no…" he replied, nose wrinkling a bit. The stuff looked and smelled completely unappetizing.

Darcy shrugged and swallowed the bits in her mouth as the lights went down in the theater and noise started blaring from the speakers. Loki fought the urge to cover his ears as he saw Darcy grinning at him from the corner of his eye.

Almost three hours later the movie was over, Darcy had devoured the entire tub of popcorn as well as most of the Dr. Pepper, and Loki was completely confused. Darcy grabbed his arm and led him out of the darkened theater to the outside, which was thankfully also dark as the sun had set while they were inside. She let go as soon as they were on the sidewalk and turned towards the SHIELD base.

"What did you think?" Darcy asked with a grin a minute or so later.

"…I don't understand. Why would the giant transforming machines want to destroy Midgard?"

"Because they don't like humans," Darcy replied simply.

"…but why _destroy_ it? Why not take over Midgard and turn all the humans into slaves or something?" Loki replied, aware of the irony of himself questioning a decision to destroy a realm.

Darcy shrugged, "It's an action movie about robots, Loki. I don't think it's supposed to make sense."

"…I still don't understand…"

"Well there were two prequels. This one is the third in a series."

Loki blinked. "There were _two more _disastrous movies just like that?"

"Well, the first one was better…" Darcy admitted.

"…I don't understand you humans," Loki replied.

"Well, we don't understand you gods, so I think that makes us even," Darcy said in return, grinning up at him.

Loki chuckled briefly, "I suppose it does."

"I got you to laugh!" Darcy exclaimed, jumping a bit in her excitement.

Loki contorted his features back into a scowl. "You certainly did not."

She grinned, "Sure, Mr. Mischief. You keep telling yourself that."

Loki rolled his eyes and separated from Darcy's side, as their walk had taken them back to the base already.

"Goodnight!" she called after him, waving enthusiastically.

Loki waved at her over his shoulder and disappeared to his room quietly. He was glad to be rid of the company, but as he lay down to sleep for the night he found himself a bit sad that she wasn't still hanging onto his arm.

* * *

><p>The next morning was altogether boring. Loki woke up, took a shower, and wandered through the SHIELD kitchens, charming one of cooks into feeding him something remotely edible for breakfast. Afterwards he wandered by Jane's lab, peeking in the door to see both her and Darcy deep into their work. Such things were incredibly boring to him, so he walked on without disturbing them. He had learned through observation that disturbances to Jane while she worked usually led to things being thrown at the offender's head.<p>

So Loki found himself back in the library flipping through that stupid Norse Mythology book again. He was fairly sure that if he got someone pregnant and they gave birth to a wolf or a snake he'd be much more confused and shocked than these myths portrayed. He may be a trickster, but that was _not_ normal.

It was mid-afternoon that his day got more interesting, in the form of Darcy flopping down opposite him again.

"They're telling this one wrong," Loki said to her, thankful to have someone to talk to (he never thought he'd miss such things, but he did). He pushed the book across the table as he explained, "I had to use magic to convince Thor to dress like a woman. And it was an incredibly ugly dwarf that had the hammer. A dwarf who saw right through Thor's disguise when he became indignant at being treated like a lady and flipped over the great dining table. "

Darcy burst into laughter, "But Thor really did dress like a bride to retrieve mew mew?"

"Mjolnir," Loki corrected. Darcy mouthed the word to herself as he continued on, "and yes, he did. I only wish I had thought to capture the moment more permanently."

"What about the part with you dressing as his bridesmaid? Did that happen?" Darcy questioned.

"Of course I did. _Someone_ had to make sure everything went alright. And I made a much more attractive woman," Loki replied.

Darcy giggled (which had been Loki's plan; he liked it when she did that, although he was currently trying to convince himself that he didn't) and closed the book. "Wanna come with me to Wal-Mart?"

"To where?" Loki questioned.

"Wal-Mart. It's a store. They carry pretty much everything, which is good 'cause it's pretty much the only store in this town. I need to go pick up some stuff. Wanna come?"

Loki paused to consider. On the one hand, he wanted to read some more history books now that he was through dissecting the Norse myths. On the other, he had had lots of fun with Darcy yesterday and found he truly enjoyed her company (it was just because he was lonely, he told himself), even if her chosen activities were…unusual. "Okay," he replied finally, putting the book back on the shelf, "I shall accompany you."

Darcy grinned and grabbed at his arm, pulling him out of the library. "Why do you talk so formally?" she asked as they walked into the fresh air.

"It's just how I speak."

"It's weird."

"But to me, your form of speaking is strange," Loki countered.

"You got a point," Darcy replied, letting go of his arm once she was sure that he was following her.

Loki kept in step beside her as they walked through the town. "How goes the research?" he questioned her. Jane would never answer him and he didn't feel much like poking around their files until he knew for sure he could find something useful. He really didn't think they could have made much progress yet, but he was hoping that there was at least some; otherwise it could take years to rebuild the Bifrost from this end.

Darcy shrugged, "Its going. Slowly, but its going."

"I am beginning to wonder if I shall ever see my home again…" he replied, squinting up at the cloud-free sky.

"I thought that you knew ways other than the whats-a-macallit to get back and forth?" Darcy replied.

"Bifrost," Loki corrected, "and I do. I simply do not have the power to use them currently. And with this realm being as devoid of magic as it is, my reserves could take a long while to recharge. A very long while."

"Like, years?"

"Perhaps," Loki replied. They wouldn't take much more than six months, hopefully, but it couldn't hurt to let Darcy think it would take longer.

"I'm sorry, dude. I know you probably miss your family…"

Loki shrugged. "Sometimes," he concurred, "although things were left on such bad terms that I doubt they would take me back with open arms…" Loki refused to feel miserable about that.

"You did send a killer robot after your brother and his friends."

"Would you believe me if I told you I did it for his own good? He did get his powers back as a result, after all."

"No," Darcy replied, like he had expected.

"Good," Loki replied, "Because I didn't." He left it at that and went silent. He liked that Darcy was smart enough to not trust him. It made conversation more fun.

Darcy studied him as they continued towards a warehouse-looking building with "Wal-Mart" emblazoned on the front. It was right on the outskirts of the town and Loki had never been out this way before. "Um…you should probably stay close," Darcy told him as they entered, "You never know what kind of crazies will be in here…"

Loki looked around in the vicinity of where they had entered and stepped closer to Darcy. She was right. Some of these people did not look entirely stable. Their manner of dress was odd, even for a human.

Darcy grabbed a metal cart and put his hands on the handle. "Push this for me. Don't hit anything," she ordered.

Loki frowned at the cart as he followed Darcy to the opposite end of the store. It was quite hard to steer, making Loki wonder how come there weren't any major collisions in the area yet. Loki, of course, could manage fine; he just wondered how they did. "What are we here for?" Loki questioned as they went past an aisle stocked with brightly colored toys.

"Well, mainly supplies. Paper, notebooks, snack food…" Darcy replied, ducking into an aisle lined with the paper and notebooks she had mentioned.

Loki waited at the end of the aisle and watched as a lady walked by with a screaming child in tow. He rolled his eyes. She could at least be polite and shut the kid up. "Why are human children so obnoxious?" he questioned of Darcy when she came back with an armful of notebooks and a couple packages of graph paper to throw in the cart.

"What? You and Thor weren't loud and obnoxious children?" Darcy questioned as she grabbed some pens and pencils as well.

"I was a quiet child," Loki replied.

"Of course you were."

"But even Thor was not _that_ obnoxious. At least not in public. Don't children here get taught how to behave?"

"Well, yes. But they want attention," Darcy replied, grabbing onto the front end of the cart and turning it around. As they walked back towards the food she stopped suddenly and started walking into a section that looked like women's clothing.

"Where are you going?" Loki questioned as she pulled the cart along behind her, him attached to the other end.

"I need more bras," she replied bluntly.

Loki stopped short and she turned to face him. "Shouldn't you shop for your undergarments alone?" he asked, eyes wide. He was pretty sure he hadn't signed up for this.

Darcy rolled her eyes. "Well, we're here now, Loki. And I need to buy some."

Loki wasn't sure what he could do in this situation but follow her as he didn't want to get lost in this warehouse or have to talk to someone else. He was currently regretting ever agreeing to this. He sighed, leaning his elbows onto the cart and resting his chin in his hands as he tried to avoid watching Darcy flip through the undergarment section. Suddenly she came bounding over to him with a multitude of shockingly bright options in her hands. Loki straightened up and tried to avoid looking at them.

"Loki!" Darcy hissed, waiting for him to turn towards her before continuing to speak. "Which ones?"

Loki blinked at her before averting his eyes again. "Um. I'm not sure that I am the best person to ask as I have no opinion on the matter," he replied a little shakily. This sort of thing would never happen on Asgard. It was considered highly inappropriate for a man to be involved in such things.

He saw Darcy pouting out of the corner of his eye as she looked over the selections herself before deciding and tossing four of the less bright options into the cart. Loki sighed as she went to put the other ones back. This girl was crazy, he was pretty sure. "Okay. Snacks now!" Darcy announced as she took hold of the front of the cart again and led him towards the snack food, where she picked up something called "pop-tarts" and a few different kinds of crackers.

Loki followed her towards the front of the store and into a line, where she put everything on the small conveyor belt before turning to grin at him.

"See? That wasn't so bad," she said happily.

Loki stared at her wide-eyed and nodded slowly, causing her to giggle again before turning around and handing the lady behind the machine some money. Loki felt slightly terrified by the whole experience (because who in their right mind would drag someone they barely knew _undergarment shopping_), but found that since this was Darcy he was already slowly forgiving her. He fought the feeling briefly before giving up as Darcy pulled a couple of large canvas shoulder bags out of her purse in which she placed the purchases, handing him the one with all of the notebooks in it. He felt relieved at this as he followed her out the front door. He noticed she was still smiling.

* * *

><p>Luckily after the adventure in Wal-Mart Darcy left him alone for a few days, which gave him time to recover mentally from the experience. Darcy was unlike anyone he'd ever spent time with and could be quite tiresome. He didn't want to investigate the niggling feeling that he actually might like her any further.<p>

So, it was the fourth night after the Wal-Mart trip that Darcy poked her head into his room without knocking. "You busy?"

Loki jumped a little and turned sharply to the door. "Don't you people knock?" he demanded.

"I don't," Darcy replied, stepping into the room, "So…I've been hoarding alcohol. Wanna help me drink it?"

Loki blinked at her. "…What?"

"It'll be fun. We can go up to the roof, listen to some music, get wasted…"

"…'wasted?'"

"Drunk," Darcy clarified. "C'mon…pleeeease?"

Loki studied Darcy, who was watching at him with a look somewhere between pleading and hopefulness. He sighed. It wasn't like he had anything else to do, and a drink sounded nice. "Fine…" Loki agreed finally, knowing he would regret it but telling himself that he'd just stay for a couple drinks.

"Yes!" Darcy exclaimed, happily grabbing his arm and pulling him along behind her and up towards the roof.

Loki was impressed by the amount of liquor Darcy had assembled up there. There was quite a bit of wine as well as some whiskey and tequila and a few bottles of scotch. It would take a week of binge drinking to get through all of it. "Impressive," Loki approved as he sat on one of the lawn chairs situated near the center of the roof.

"Thanks," she grinned, turning on a stereo in the corner. Luckily she didn't turn it up too loud and Loki wasn't that annoyed by the music playing. He had found that most of the so-called music of Midgard was rather obnoxious, just strange sounds with no real melody. Loki much preferred the music from the last time he had visited. Darcy came over with a bottle of wine and a couple glasses, handing him one before trying to uncork the bottle.

"Let me," Loki said before he could stop himself, taking the bottle and uncorking it with ease before pouring both glasses.

"Thanks," Darcy replied, smiling as she took a sip.

Loki put the bottle down and looked up at the sky, trying to ignore the fact that he was being _nice_ to this particular human. It was a very nice night. He'd focus on that.

Two hours later both he and Darcy were what could be considered drunk. They were hunched against the small retaining wall that formed the edge of the roof taking turns drinking out of a bottle of wine.

"Tell me about the last time you were here," Darcy slurred a little as she set the now-empty bottle next to the others.

Loki sighed, leaning his head back against the wall. "Why?"

Darcy shrugged. "I'm curious, is all."

Loki studied her as best he could through the slight alcohol-induced haze. It couldn't hurt to share a little. The alcohol was clouding his brain just enough for him to think it sounded like an excellent idea. "I spent a few months down here in 1925," he said slowly.

"The Roaring 20s? No way!" Darcy exclaimed with a grin.

Loki smiled back softly. Apparently alcohol made her more endearing. "Yes. It was fun. Humans then had the right idea. Well, not with Prohibition. But the nightlife that sprang up because of that was amazing…"

"Did you spend a lot of time in the speakeasies?" she questioned, watching him with as much attention as she could muster through the amount of alcohol in her system.

Loki grinned. "Of course I did," he replied, "Want to hear about it?"

"A first-hand account of the Roaring 20s? Yes!" she replied happily with a giggle.

"Okay then," Loki replied. He'd never recounted his experiences from the 20s before, but now seemed like as good a time as any. So he started into the story.

* * *

><p>AN: So, there's that. Next chapter comes complete with many flashbacks to the 1920s. It's taking me a lot longer to write due to the research element, so it might be a bit. ^^

Please review! I like hearing y'all's thoughts and it only takes a second!

(PS: I haven't seen Transformers 3 yet as it's not out until tomorrow, so I know nothing about it. I just thought it would be funny. XD)


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Thor and company belong to Marvel, not me.

A/N: In this chapter Loki's talking about the time he spent in 1920s America. All these flashbacks will be in italics, but he's actually narrating these events to Darcy. Just so that you don't get confused. ^^  
>I did <em>a lot<em> of research for this chapter. _A lot_. But at some point, I take artistic license. So don't get too mad if you spot any inaccuracies (although please do point them out, if you will, for future reference XD).

A Trickster Distracted

Chapter Three

* * *

><p><em>Loki stepped onto the nighttime streets of Chicago quietly, taking in the bright lights with a grin. This was much better than Asgard, which had become quite stuffy. Everyone was looking at him sideways in the aftermath of his latest set of pranks. He didn't feel that he deserved any of the negative attention, especially since he had already been punished when they had sewn his mouth shut for a month. You could still see the scars around his lips.<em>

_Here, no one knew him. No one could glare at him like he didn't belong. It had been close to a century since he'd journeyed down to Midgard and so much had changed. Loki found himself excited. There were things down here that Asgardians would never have thought up, no matter how superior they believed themselves._

_He'd watched from the shadows for a couple days before stepping into the world. Chicago was an interesting place. There was enough going on to keep him entertained for as long as he chose to stay here._

_He'd shadowed some guy for a while until he felt he had the hang of the society and then entered it himself. Now he'd been interacting in Chicago for a couple days and was having more fun than he'd had since making Thor dress as a woman. One of his acquaintances, Frank, was supposed to be meeting him here to show him one of the so-called speakeasies. Loki had heard talk about them and was interested in seeing what they were all about._

"_Hey, Tom!" he heard Frank greet as he came up behind him (the name Loki was really too ostentatious, so he'd chosen another one)._

"_Hello," he replied, putting out the cigarette he had been smoking. He didn't much care for them, but so many people smoked that it was the quickest way to fit in._

_The speakeasy was actually underground and walking into it was like walking into a whole other world. This establishment could definitely keep him busy for a while. He lost track of Frank pretty quickly, but didn't care all that much with the overabundance of things to take in. He ordered a drink and leaned back on the bar, taking in his surroundings._

_The jazz was loud and most of the patrons were busy dancing the night away. Loki was somewhat mesmerized by all the women in their finery with their bobbed hair and short fringe- and bead-ridden dresses—flappers, he thought he'd heard them called. He had just finished his drink when one of them sashayed his way._

"_How's about a dance?" she drawled at him._

_Loki glanced at the current dancers before looking back at his new companion. "I'm afraid I'm not all that familiar with the steps," he replied._

"_That's alright, sugar. I can teach you," she replied as she led him out to the floor. Loki knew how to dance; there had been plenty of balls in Asgard to learn at. However this was a completely different kind of dancing. Loki studied the people around them carefully as she situated his arms around her. He was aware that he would be expected to lead and wanted to get it somewhat right, and he was confident enough in his ability to learn by observation to feel okay out on the dance floor, so he played along._

"So you just danced all night?" Darcy asked.

"Yeah," Loki replied with a shrug, "It's what people did back then."

"Tell me more," Darcy insisted.

Loki sighed and twisted the cap off one of the Tequila bottles. It was probably a bad idea with the amount of alcohol already in their systems, but he didn't really care. "Okay. Well…"

_A couple weeks had passed and Loki was a nightly visitor to the speakeasy. He had caught on quickly to the way things worked and realized that causing mischief was as easy as one misplaced hand or thrown word. Loki relishes the power he can have over these people; power that he could never have at the same level in Asgard where they are already too wary of him._

_But he does notice a man who has more power over these people than he does. He seems to own the place, if the way the employees and women tend to act around him is any indication. He's a dangerous man by human standards and Loki is curious to learn more about him. Unfortunately no one gets close to him except for the occasional dancing girl or prostitute and his bodyguards._

_Loki watches the women in the joint carefully; studying the way they move, the way they interact. They all act like best friends no matter how well they know each other. They have a spellbinding power over any man in the place but him. Loki finds that he's curious as to how things go from that side. He could probably cause much more trouble and figure out more about the owner of the establishment. It's not like he hasn't spent time on Midgard as a woman before…_

Darcy interrupted by spitting tequila all over him. "WHAT?" she exclaimed when she was done sputtering.

"I've been on Midgard many times," Loki replied, trying not to laugh at the adorably dumbfounded look on her face (and trying to ignore that he had just thought that) as he takes another sip from the bottle. "Some of those times I've taken on a female form."

Darcy gaped at him.

"Really," Loki deadpans. He feels lightheaded. Tequila on top of the…however many bottles of wine they'd already drained had certainly been an incredibly bad idea.

Darcy grabbed the bottle from him and took another sip. "You're totally telling me more about that later," she demanded.

"You're lucky I'm even telling you this story," Loki replied, taking the bottle back, "Do you want to hear more or not?"

Darcy nodded, "I do!"

"Then hush."

_So Loki acquired all the necessary items through various means and created a new identity: Lydia; the typical flapper and party girl, of course. Loki was here to have fun, after all. Besides, he'd always looked good in green and this female form was no exception. _

_Loki was loitering in a corner of the speakeasy with the other girls, giggling at some unfortunate soul who couldn't take his liquor, when he caught sight of the man from before; the one Loki figured had the most power. Loki would like to take that power. More specifically, he wanted to manipulate it. After all, manipulating one person was easier (and more fun) than just taking their power and trying to exert it oneself. From what he had observed, the man himself chose who surrounded him. So now what Loki had to do was simply catch his eye._

_So Loki disentangled himself from his giggling companions and made his way into the dancing masses, making sure he was within the sightline of his target as he started to dance with a couple of the other girls. Loki managed to catch the man's eyes briefly and knew that he was in. He allowed a grin, more of a smirk, as the man leaned towards one of the bodyguard-types to whisper something, eyes still on Loki._

_The guy made his way out onto the floor, coming up behind Loki and trying to gain his attention. "Miss?" he addressed him._

_Loki giggled and spun around, leaning into the man by placing his hands softly on the man's chest to see if he was in fact carrying a gun (which he was). "Lydia!" he announced into his ear._

_The man's lips quirked slightly, as if trying not to smile, before he addressed Loki again. "Miss Lydia, if you'll come with me? Mr. Capone is interested in talking with you."_

"_How nifty!" Loki giggled, looking for all the world like a drunken dancing girl. He allowed the man to lead him towards Capone's corner. The only room in the circular booth was next to the man himself, so Loki slid in with another giggle, carefully perched on the end so as to not seem too hasty._

"_Thank you for joining me," the mysterious Mr. Capone said as someone set a drink in front of Loki. Loki wasn't even close to as drunk as he'd been pretending to be, and Midgardian drugs could be negated by his magic, so he didn't see any harm in taking a sip._

_Loki did so, with another giggle (really, his cheeks were getting sore). "Lydia," he reminded again._

"_Then you may call me Al," he replied. Loki hid his triumphant grin behind his glass…_

"Wait!" Darcy interrupted again, slightly more slurred than the last time, "you knew Al Capone? _The_ Al Capone?"

Loki rolled his eyes. "Obviously," he replied with a slight sneer, taking back the tequila bottle for himself and sipping carefully, "and you should really stop interrupting if you want to hear any more."

Darcy looked properly quelled and nodded. "Sorry. Please continue?"

Loki sighed and shook his head, blaming the alcohol for his compliance in the matter.

_Al Capone was a vicious man, Loki quickly learned. After the first meeting he offered Loki a job (it was heavily implied that Loki say 'yes' or else). The job was simple, and nothing Loki wasn't doing anyways. He simply needed to report back to the man with information he overheard in the bar area. Loki, curious as to what his information was used for, gave over a tidbit about the cop he had found frequenting the bar in order to watch Mr. Capone (Loki was very observant, after all, and drunk cops easily talked about their jobs with pretty girls). _

_He used his invisibility to follow Capone the next day and find out what he would do with this information. He sent a guard out to talk to the man, which Loki soon figured out meant 'bribe' when he followed. When the cop wouldn't take the bribe, he wound up in the river._

_Loki liked this man's style. It would be very easy to cause mischief around here with Capone as his puppet._

_So, Loki gathered information, carefully selecting which bits would be best suited to gain Capone's trust and, in the long run, put Loki in a position of favoritism. It was actually quite easy._

_Another thing Loki noticed was that though Capone had a wife, she wasn't ever around the so-called business deals that constituted Capone's job. In fact, Capone always had someone other than his wife on his arm._

_About two weeks into Loki's employment he was called into Capone's office. Loki perched carefully on the chair he was pointed to and took the drink offered him delicately._

"_Your information has been very useful," Capone said as he sat behind his desk._

"_I'm glad," Loki replied with a giggle, "It's amazing what someone will say when they don't think you're listening."_

_Capone studied Loki for a moment during which Loki was quite sure he was trying to figure Lydia out. He wasn't unintelligent and Loki knew that he knew that Loki was rather intelligent as well (although he probably had no idea of just _how_ intelligent). "It seems almost like you were born for this job," Capone said finally._

"_I'm sure I don't know what you mean, Mr. Capone," Loki replied carefully, leaning forward and setting his glass on the edge of the desk._

"_I told you that you may call me Al," he replied steadily. Loki caught his eyes drifting to his bosom._

"_Al," Loki corrected himself, letting the name linger a bit longer than necessary before continuing. "I've simply been doing what you asked of me," Loki said, lifting himself slowly from his seat, "nothing more."_

_Al nodded, "Yes, but most ladies such as yourself wouldn't know good information from a deck of cards."_

_Loki grinned, walking around the desk slowly to approach him. "As you can tell, I'm a bit more…special," he replied slowly, leaning into the man's personal space. He could almost feel Al's pulse quicken._

"_I can see that," he replied quietly, almost to himself._

_Loki leaned closer, resting a hand gently on Al's shoulder as he spoke into his ear, "I can show you if you like?" _

_It was at that point that Loki was roughly pulled into the man's lap. Loki laughed and leaned in to…_

"Whoa, whoa, WHOA!" Darcy said, skittering backwards a bit, "TMI, dude!"

Loki blinked at her slowly, "I beg your pardon?"

"I do _not _need to hear stories about your…sexual conquests," Darcy replied with a shiver, "as a woman. Like, at all. _Ever_."

"I thought you wanted to know?" Loki shrugged, hiding a grin at her expression of half-horror, half-disgust by taking another swig from the tequila bottle. Maybe telling stories about his past could be fun.

"Just…skip the sex parts, huh?" Darcy replied with another shudder.

Loki rolled his eyes. "There's really not much more to say then," he replied, noticing that his words were starting to slur now as well. "I spent the rest of my time there using my…leverage with Capone to get him to do pretty much whatever I wanted. Suggestion is a powerful tool. It was really quite fun."

Darcy gaped at him. "So…you _ran_ the organized crime in Chicago by _sleeping with _Al Capone?"

"Pretty much," Loki replied with a grin, "It was quite exhilarating, having that power. And just what I needed."

Darcy gaped at him some more.

"You're catching flies," Loki pointed out. He'd always liked that particular Midgardian expression.

She closed her mouth quickly. "I'm sorry, but you just said that _living as a woman for a few months _was _just what you needed_?"

"The alcohol must be making you slow…" Loki replied thoughtfully, "It's not like I hadn't done it before. More time, actually. Being a woman removed a lot of the responsibilities I would have had to have otherwise…"

Darcy was gaping again.

Loki rolled his eyes, "But it couldn't last. After about five months I returned home. I felt better enough to brave Asgard again and it was only a matter of time before someone came looking for me. Ever since I spent those eight years hiding out here in the middle ages, they were more wary of where I'd gotten to…" It really saddened him quite a bit. He had liked it when they had ignored his whereabouts for years on end. And more time in 1920s Chicago would have been fun.

"Tell me about that now," Darcy slurred as she stole the bottle back.

Loki considered her for a moment, wondering if this was at all beneficial to him. It couldn't hurt. She was so drunk at this point that the chances of her remembering anything he said now later were smaller than a gnat.

"Okay…" he sighed, "but you'll owe me."

"Whatever you want, dude," Darcy agreed with a drunken grin.

So Loki began the story.

* * *

><p>AN: This chapter was originally going to include another flashback to the middle ages, but it got ridiculously long, so that's the next chapter.

Please tell me what you thought!

PS: My friend drew a flapper Loki because of this chapter, so this is what he looked like in his wonderful flapper getup: estell-chan . deviantart . com / # / d3keq6o


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Thor and company belong to Marvel, not me.

A/N: More flashback in this chapter. This time to the middle ages. Again, they're in italics.

A Trickster Distracted

Chapter Four

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><p><em>Loki was bored. Extremely bored. There was only so much to do on Asgard and Loki felt he had exhausted all his options at this point. It was not a great feeling, especially considering he'd have to live there for the rest of his extraordinary long life. Loki was lying on his bed trying to figure out what he could do when his brother came in.<em>

"_What are you doing Loki? The feast started an hour ago," Thor announced in his obnoxiously booming voice._

"_I'm not coming," Loki replied simply._

"_Why not?"_

"_Feasts are boring, Thor. I'm going to go do something exciting."_

"_Like what?"_

_Loki considered for a moment. "I think I'll visit Midgard," he decided. Messing with humans was always fun. The last time he was there was a fond memory._

"_Brother, you can't just go down to Midgard anytime you're bored," Thor replied with a sigh._

_Loki glared at his brother. "Well then maybe I'll stay there. Where people will _appreciate_ me," he snarled as he got up from his bed. He stalked out of the room and then towards the Bifrost as fast as he could._

"Why were you mad at Thor?" Darcy asked. Loki was surprised at her ability to still think straight. She could really hold her liquor.

Loki shrugged, "Why wasn't I mad at Thor?" he replied, "I believe that at that juncture it was because I had gotten in trouble for something that was completely his fault. It's irrelevant."

Darcy looked like she was going to question him more before changing her mind. "So what happened when you got to Earth?"

_Loki stepped into the inn quietly, stepping carefully towards the bar. "Can I help you, little miss?" asked the man tending it._

_Loki stepped closer and addressed the man carefully, keeping a timidness in his voice that was typical of young women in these parts. "Yes? I was told to come see the owner for work?" he replied._

"_You're the orphan girl Miss Adelaide sent over, then? Lucia, right?" the man questioned. Loki nodded in reply. "You'll want to go see my wife back in the kitchens, then," he said, pointing to a door._

"_Thank you, sir," Loki replied with a small curtsey before walking in the direction. He rolled his eyes. It was hilarious how differently he was treated when he looked like a fifteen-year-old girl than when he had disguised himself as a young man. Female orphans tended to be cared for while boys were ignored or chased after with pitchforks (that had actually been quite amusing after the fact, but Loki did not care to repeat the event)._

_The man who owned the inn was named Geoffrey. He was gruff, but nice enough, and his wife Sabine was a kind woman who patiently taught Loki everything he'd need to know to do his job. His main job was taking care of the animals kept for food, but he also helped clean every once in a while. It was tedious, but better than going back to Asgard. People around here weren't nearly as obnoxious. Mostly because it was an inn on the outskirts of a tiny waytown where people tended to be uncouth and cause trouble, which was always highly amusing to Loki._

_Loki's favorite part of his job was the cows. There were five incredibly sweet milk cows kept out back. They were always happy to see him and very affectionate, even though Loki figured the milking process couldn't be all that comfortable._

_His favorite pastime, however, was watching Geoffrey threaten the guests that made 'unwanted passes' at him. Loki was quite good at getting the men riled up enough to set Geoffrey off then feigning innocence later._

_Loki had been on Midgard for a little more than half a year when everything changed. He had been working in the small vegetable garden they had a bit further out from town when a sharp whinny broke through the air. Loki looked up sharply to see a horse galloping towards him. He glanced around to make sure no one was watching before calming the creature with magic. Its rider had been lost at some point, so Loki climbed up into the saddle and galloped the horse to where it had come from, just past the sightline from the garden._

_A man was collapsed under a tree by the side of the road, holding a knife out unsteadily to try to fend off the large snake that was hissing at him. Loki could tell that the man had already been bitten on his thigh and would die shortly if something was not done. Not wanting such a thing on his conscience, Loki quickly dismounted from the horse, grabbing what he was assuming was the man's sword from where it had seemingly fallen when the man got bitten and fell._

_Loki made quick work of the snake, slicing its head off cleanly. He then made his way over to the man, who was close to slipping into unconsciousness. The man looked up at him in some sort of awe, which is when Loki remembered that young maidens like himself typically didn't attack snakes with broadswords. He smiled at the man, who managed to slur out something Loki couldn't understand as his head lolled to the side. Loki panicked a little and reached for his magic, knowing that anyone coming across them as it was now would be extremely bad. He eliminated the venom from the wound before leveraging the only semi-conscious man back up onto the horse._

_Loki led the horse back towards the inn. Once he knew he was within hearing range of Sabine's kitchen, he started yelling for her, explaining that the man must have been attacked and wounded somehow and the horse had wandered up to the garden. Sabine called for Geoffrey, who got the man into one of the rooms while Sabine went to find the town doctor._

_He lurked outside the door while the doctor examined the man. "It's a snake bite. And he's a damn lucky man. There's not a trace of venom, but those snakes can easily make a grown man drop dead in a half-hour…" Loki let out a sigh of relief before running back to tend to his chores._

_Loki was told to take the man lunch the next day once he was awoken and checked over by the doctor. He entered the room to see the man sitting up in the bed. He looked over when Loki entered and his eyes twinkled in recognition. "I remember you," he said, "you used my broadsword to kill the snake. Quite a feat for a girl."_

"_I have no idea what you mean," Loki replied as he set the tray of food in the man's lap._

_He smiled. "Of course not. Because then you did magic to rid my wound of the venom."_

"_I'm sure I did no such thing, sir," Loki replied with a huff, "a girl like me is not educated in such things."_

_The man shook his head with a chuckle. "Usually not," he replied as he picked up the spoon on the tray to start in on the stew, "So I suppose I should thank the gods that it is you who found me and not another of the townsfolk."_

_Loki narrowed his eyes at the man as he started to chew. He had thought the man was too delirious to remember anything later, but apparently not._

"_I thank you, miss," he said, "for saving my life."_

_Loki snorted and left the room, hearing the man chuckle as he closed the door behind him._

_The man's name was Edwin. He was a knight of the kingdom, newly made so. He was bedridden for a few days as the snake had managed to clip a major artery and he had lost much blood. When he was up and about again he came out to the stables during the morning milking to introduce himself to Loki more fully and thank him yet again. Loki insisted he had no idea what Edwin was talking about, but knew it didn't work as Edwin only smirked in response._

_He stuck around the inn for a week before he left, at which time Loki was relieved as Edwin had taken to trying to talk to him any chance he got._

_A few months later Edwin rode back through. Loki tried to avoid him, but it didn't work. "Miss Lucia!" he called as he came into the milking barn the morning after arriving._

"_You're not allowed in here," Loki replied as he continued his work._

"_While I was away from here I found myself thinking of you," Edwin told him as he sat on a stool a few feet away from where Loki was milking the last cow._

"_How wonderful…" Loki grumbled._

"_A young maiden like yourself is usually not trained in swordsmanship and magic, yet you seem to have been," Edwin continued on._

"_You are mistaken, sir, as I keep telling you," Loki insisted, but he could see Edwin smirking again from the corner of his eye._

"_But I have been thinking about it and have to the conclusion that a maiden such as yourself would be an excellent knight's wife," Edwin concluded._

_Loki dropped the milking pail he had been moving, spilling the milk across the floor with a clatter. He ignored the milk soaking into his skirts as he turned to gape at Edwin._

_Edwin chuckled and reached out to close Loki's open mouth. "You should not gape so, Lucia."_

"_Begging your pardon, sir, but I believe I'm hearing things," Loki managed to reply. He was greatly confused by this turn of events._

"_You are not," Edwin assured, "a maiden like you should not be in this small waytown, but somewhere where your talents will be appreciated. Like my own home." _

_Loki wondered if all people were this forward with their…strange marriage proposals._

"_I have already spoken with Geoffrey and he agrees that you may leave back to my home with me."_

_Now Loki felt indignant. He knew that this was the way such things were done, but it still made him mad that Edwin had already talked to Geoffrey about this ridiculous proposal. He stood up, hands on hips, and glared down at Edwin. "And what if I cannot stand you and want nothing to do with this plan of yours?" he demanded._

_Edwin chuckled, smirking again. "I do not believe that to be the case. Do you not want to get out of this place and to somewhere more…elegant?"_

_Loki continued to glare down at Edwin. He really wanted nothing to do with this so-called 'elegance'. The complete lack of it was, after all, one of the reasons he was enjoying his time away from Asgard. He studied Edwin's face, upon which was the fascination he always looked at Loki with as well as hopefulness for the answer he wanted Loki to give. He considered the offer for a moment. It would be interesting to see the other ways of life in this world after spending a year doing this. But Loki was pretty sure he didn't want to marry a human, even one as charming as Edwin. Loki took a second to chastise himself for thinking that thought before concentrating on what this offer meant._

_It became obvious Loki was taking too long to think over this when Edwin interrupted. "Lucia?" he asked as he stood up._

_Loki looked up at him, chewing on the inside of his cheek. "I need to clean up this milk," he announced, actually running away from Edwin to collect the rags to do so with. He didn't come back out until he was sure Edwin was gone._

_The next morning Edwin came into the barn while Loki was milking again. "If you make me spill this milk today, I will hurt you," Loki warned without turning around. He heard Edwin chuckle as he leaned against the wall of the barn. Loki worked in silence. He liked Edwin. And the fact that Edwin appreciated him was kind of nice after all the un-appreciating that went on in Asgard. As Loki finished up the milking and began to carry it back to the inn, he turned slightly to address Edwin. "Aye," he said before turning to leave._

"You got married?" Darcy asked.

Loki nodded. "Edwin was very nice. I spent another seven years there before leaving and going back home…"

"You just left?"

"Well, I faked my death. But yeah."

"Why?"

"I needed to get back home. I didn't actually _want_ to leave. We had…children. Three of them," Loki admitted quietly, "I lost track of them. I don't know what happened…" He wasn't sure if it was the alcohol, but Loki was suddenly feeling very guilty about the whole thing. He had never explained everything to Edwin, although he had done his fair share of magic while living there. And leaving three young children behind…Loki wondered if it was possible to track down any surviving descendants now, but decided it probably wasn't. Loki shook off his thoughts and drained the rest of the bottle he was holding.

"That's it?" Darcy slurred questioningly, "Didn't you ever go back? What about Edwin?"

Loki looked away. "No," he answered quietly, "I never went back to him."

"But…he…he _loved_ you…and…" At this point she trailed off and started sniffling. Loki looked over sharply to see that she was crying now. Loki blamed the alcohol. It seemed that alcohol made Darcy…emotional.

Loki wasn't sure what to do when faced with a drunk, crying young woman on the roof of a research facility. So he settled for setting down the bottle and handing Darcy one of the napkins set under a weight on one of the chairs. Darcy wiped at her face before stuffing the napkin into her pocket. "I think that's enough drinking for tonight…" Loki announced as Darcy continued to sniffle. He stood slowly, making sure that he could keep his balance before holding out a hand to help Darcy up. He might as well be polite.

After he made sure that Darcy got back to her room without tripping and hurting herself Loki returned to his own quarters. As he lay down on his bed Loki couldn't help but wonder why he had been so accommodating with Darcy during their drinking binge. Loki tried to think about something else as he didn't feel like dissecting his pseudo-friendship with Darcy, but the only other thing his mind could focus on was Edwin and how bad he felt about leaving him.

* * *

><p>AN: According to Norse myth (the Poetic Edda) Loki spent eight years on Earth as a milkmaid:  
>Odin speaks:<br>" Winters eight wast thou under the earth,  
>Milking the cows as a maid,<br>(Ay, and babes didst thou bear;  
>Unmanly thy soul must seem.)"<br>So yeah, that's where that came from.

But I made up Edwin, who is pretty much the most charming character I've ever created.

Tell me what you think?


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Thor and company belong to Marvel, not me.

A/N: So so sorry for the wait. ^^

A Trickster Distracted

Chapter Five

* * *

><p>The next morning when Loki woke up he was delightfully hangover-free. Darcy, unfortunately, did not share this fate. Loki thanked his other-worldly alcohol tolerance as he stumbled (gracefully) into Jane's mini-kitchen to find Darcy with her head down on the table, groaning into her arms. He got the milk from the fridge and poured a glass for himself before sitting next to her.<p>

Darcy hadn't seemed to notice him yet so he leaned closer to her ear before speaking. "Good morning," he announced, much louder than necessary at this time of morning, especially if Darcy's headache was as bad as it seemed.

Darcy's reaction wasn't nearly as satisfying as Loki had hoped. She simply looked up at him, glared, and stole his milk.

"So not a good morning then?" Loki replied with a grin, deciding to let the milk theft go for now.

"Shut up," Darcy replied, draining the glass and setting it back on the table, "it's your fault."

"_My _fault?" Loki replied indignantly, "_You_ were the one who came into my room with the great idea to go on a drinking binge."

"But you were the one telling the interesting stories and opening all the bottles," Darcy replied, resting her chin back on her arms.

Loki paused, face warming, "You…remember those?"

"It's fuzzy…" Darcy replied, "I remember a lot about the twenties and not a lot from there…"

"Good." Loki relaxed back into his seat.

Darcy glared at him again, but didn't speak. Loki sat in silence and glared back. It was actually rather pleasant until Jane came stumbling in (much less gracefully than Loki had earlier). Darcy turned to Jane, who was bleary-eyed and seemed mostly out of it. "There's no coffee yet," she announced.

Jane grumbled a little under her breath and went about clumsily making a pot of the strong-smelling drink. Loki had yet to try any of it, but from what he knew it was good for helping one wake up and it looked like Jane needed it.

Loki turned back to Darcy when the girl started tugging on his sleeve. "More milk?"

"Get your own milk," Loki replied, pulling his arm out of her reach.

Darcy pouted, but didn't get up. Loki glared at her. Darcy glared back.

They were interrupted when Jane sat down heavily in the third chair. "What did you two do last night?" she asked tiredly.

"Drink," they replied in unison.

* * *

><p>Darcy spent the whole day with her head in her arms in the kitchen. Loki thought it was a bit pathetic, really, but he hadn't expected much else. By the end of the day Jane had roped Loki into helping her via explaining the Bifrost. Unfortunately, Jane couldn't understand a single thing he said and he hadn't yet completely grasped the concepts of science the way Midgardians used it. By nightfall he had made a decision to fix that as soon as possible and had convinced Jane to loan him her small library of physics books.<p>

Dr. Selvig spent the whole day watching Loki skeptically. Every time Loki caught Selvig's eye the man gave him an intense look that seemed to be meant to communicate "You touch them and you die." Loki usually just grinned at him in reply.

Around nine o'clock Selvig got a pizza delivered and the four of them sat down in the kitchen for dinner. Loki picked at his two slices a bit disgustedly as the other three chowed down. Darcy was much more her usual self and kept making faces at him when he picked things off of his pizza. He methodically separated all of the toppings into piles before ripping the crust part off and eating them first. He then picked through the more appetizing of the toppings before pushing the plate away.

Darcy quickly grabbed the plate and finished off his picked-at meal. Loki scooted away from her in disgust and tried to focus on the question Jane seemed to be asking him.

"…think it will take to explain the Bifrost?"

"That depends on how well you understand it," Loki replied, "As soon as I catch up on your Midgardian science it should go rather quickly. And that should only take a week at most. Depending on how fast I read. That should cancel out most of the communication difficulties we're having."

"Okay…" Jane replied slowly before turning back to Dr. Selvig. Loki went back to ignoring the conversation happening. Unfortunately the only other thing of interest in the room was Darcy, who was just finishing off Loki's share of the pizza.

Loki got up and went into the lab to start reading from Jane's library. A few hours later he was almost finished understanding how basic physics applied to Asgardian magic when Darcy came in and sat next to him on the small couch kept near the bookshelves.

"What'cha doing?" she questioned.

Loki groaned. "Is it possible for you to _not_ be completely annoying?"

"Nope!" Darcy chirped, obviously in a much better mood than she had been this morning.

Loki closed the book and turned towards her. "What is it you want then?" he replied with a sigh. He had found that when it came to Darcy it was better to acquiesce to her pestering or it would just get worse.

"Well, there's still a lot of alcohol on the roof…"

"You spent all day with a hangover from last night's drinking binge. I don't think you require another night of it," Loki pointed out.

"But I want to hear more stories," she protested.

Loki snorted. "Not happening. You already know too many."

"Buzzkill."

"…what?"

"Buzzkill. One who kills the buzz. Also known as a fun-murderer."

"That can't be a real word."

"Oh, it totally is."

"Your abuse of the English language has now reached new heights."

"Whatever, Loki. I think you're just a depressing person."

"What does that have to do with anything? It's a complete non-sequitur."

"You're just jealous."

"I'm no longer having a conversation with you," Loki replied wisely, going back to his book.

Darcy didn't bother him for a full two minutes before she started poking at his shoulder repeatedly.

"You do realize that I have been known to disembowel people that annoy me?"

"I'm sure that's a myth. You're too nice."

"I just have you fooled."

"I'm very hard to fool."

"Really?"

"Yup. I know you can't be trusted, too."

"Now you're contradicting yourself. How can I be both nice and untrustworthy?"

"Easily?"

"Oh really? _Do_ explain."

"Well, you—"

"I didn't actually want you to explain anything that goes on in your flimsy brain."

"My brain is not flimsy!"

"Really?"

"Yes! I'm a stable person. Very stable."

"I have seen no proof to support that claim."

Darcy stuck her tongue out at him.

"Very mature."

"Shut up. I hate you."

"Then go away."

"No."

Loki rolled his eyes and went back to his book again. "You are the most obnoxious person I have ever met."

Darcy didn't reply, but he could see her grinning out of the corner of his eye. Loki was beginning to wonder if he would ever be able to get rid of her now that she seemed so attached.

* * *

><p>It took almost exactly a week for Loki to read through the relevant books from Jane's library and figure out how to explain the Bifrost in terms Jane and Dr. Selvig would be able to understand. In that week he noticed that Jane was getting more and more despondent. She was mooning over Thor to an extreme extent at this point and it was incredibly grating on Loki, especially since he was in closer contact with her now that he was in the lab all day.<p>

Dr. Selvig wavered between trying to comfort Jane and watching Loki suspiciously. The man still didn't trust Loki one bit, which Loki appreciated as he seemed like the only person around here that remembered that Loki was the God of Mischief and therefore not everyone's best friend. Loki would like to know where he kept disappearing to though. During the week he had noticed that Selvig spent surprisingly little time helping Jane and a lot of time going off to somewhere else. Jane didn't really seem to notice, but Loki did and was very interested in finding out what was more interesting than trying to create a Bifrost on Earth.

Loki also managed to charm the ladies in the complex's cafeteria to set aside the nicest foods they offered for him so he wouldn't have to touch anything that might have been touched by the Midgardians. He even convinced them to bring his food down to him in the lab so he didn't have to venture into the mess hall, which was like being at a feast on Asgard but with less manners.

As soon as Loki had finished explaining everything to Jane in a way the woman could actually understand it was as if she suddenly knew exactly what to do. She jumped up and started scribbling stuff down muttering about finally having a new idea and Loki decided to just leave her alone.

Unfortunately he didn't get far before Selvig pulled him aside. "Thanks for helping Jane," he conceded gruffly.

"Something you've never seemed to understand, Dr. Selvig, is that I want the Bifrost rebuilt as much as she does," Loki replied, carefully removing the man's hand from his arm.

"This doesn't mean I trust you. Or like you," Selvig reminded.

"I would expect nothing less, Doctor," Loki replied with a smirk, "But if you'll excuse me, I must find Darcy. I told her that when I was finished here we could have dinner somewhere off-compound."

Dr. Selvig seemed to be about to reprimand Loki for spending time with Darcy, but luckily she chose that moment to appear in the hallway with a grin. "Are we leaving now?" she asked happily as she bounded like a hyperactive puppy over to the two.

"Of course," Loki replied, allowing Darcy to latch onto his arm, if only to smirk at Dr. Selvig and appreciate the glare now on his face.

Somehow Dr. Selvig managed to make his farewell of "Have fun" sound like the most menacing thing Loki had heard on Midgard so far. He made sure that they left quickly.

* * *

><p>The restaurant they wound up going to wasn't all that fancy or anything; just a small family-owned place that served what Darcy called the "fuel of America." Loki saw what she meant as it seemed everyone loved to eat these burgers.<p>

"I feel like I haven't seen you all week," Darcy said after the waiter took their orders.

"We've seen each other," Loki replied hesitantly.

"Well, yeah. But we haven't _talked_ or anything. I've missed it," Darcy replied with a shrug, playing with the straw in her water glass.

Loki wasn't quite sure how to reply to her at this point. It was true that they hadn't talked a lot recently. But what bothered Loki was the fact that _he_ had missed it too. Loki hadn't realized just how much he was starting to become attached to Darcy until he had stopped talking to her for a week. And he really wasn't sure what to make of it.

"Loki?" Darcy asked suddenly, pulling him out of his thoughts.

Loki looked back at her quickly. "Sorry. Lost in thought."

"I could tell. What about?"

"Nothing," Loki replied, waving a hand in dismissal, "So I know what I did all week, but what did you do?"

Darcy shrugged. "Ran errands, mostly. But I was generally ignored. I read Harry Potter."

"Harry Potter?"

Darcy's jaw dropped open. "You've never read Harry Potter?"

"I've only been here a month, Darcy. I haven't had _time_."

"Oh. Right. Well you should. You'd like them," Darcy replied as the waiter came back with their food.

"What are they about?" Loki questioned, genuinely curious at this point. To be honest he was interested in what Darcy was interested in because he still didn't know much about her.

So Darcy launched into a long-winded explanation of the Harry Potter books in which he actually learned surprisingly little about the story. By the time their meal was gone they were talking about Jane's research again.

"Do you think she can do it? Build the bridge-thing to Asgard?"

"The Bifrost?" Loki replied. "Possibly. She has a better chance to do so now."

"…would you…leave?" she asked in a small voice, much more timidly than her normal demeanor.

"I'm…not sure," Loki replied truthfully, "I'm not sure if I'd be allowed back. I'm sure Thor hates me now. I'm sure Fa—Odin does too."

Darcy nodded, looking down at the table as she fiddled with her bag.

"Darcy…" Loki said, not sure where he was going with the sentence and trailing off before he could get much further.

"I'd miss you. If you left, you know," she whispered, not looking up.

Loki bit his lip, shifting uneasily in his seat as the waiter came by with the check. When he left Loki reached across the table to get Darcy's attention, gently touching the bottom of her chin with the tip of his index finger. "I'd come visit. If I did wind up leaving, I mean."

"Really?" Darcy replied, voice pleading and hopeful.

"Of course," Loki assured, removing his hand from her face and allowing a small smile at the girl in front of him.

Darcy ducked her head again, digging through her bag for the money to pay for their meal as her face split into a radiant grin.

* * *

><p>The next morning Loki made his way into the kitchen later than usual. Selvig, Jane, and Darcy were already sitting around the table with their breakfasts by the time he got there. Darcy grinned up at him and handed him the cereal box before going back to whatever conversation they had been having (it sounded like they were talking about the best way to convince SHIELD to get them better equipment and more funding). Loki shrugged and went about serving himself before sitting down.<p>

"…think we can convince Coulson to get us better equipment if I show him my new ideas," Jane was concluding as he took the first bite of his breakfast.

"So you think you're on your way to solving the problems you'd had?" he questioned, genuinely curious now. His magic was coming back so slowly that he just wanted to get back to Asgard to replenish it. He briefly wondered if it would be possible to use the energy created by any Bifrost-like apparatus Jane could create to fix his magic problem and decided that it was a valid idea. And probably much more quickly accomplished as Jane would need to generate the energies before she could even think about opening any portals.

Jane nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah. Coulson's coming by today to look it over so that maybe we can get better equipment."

"Coulson?"

"The SHIELD guy that's kind of in charge of this operation," Jane explained as Selvig glared at Loki. He was obviously still untrusting.

"Ah," Loki replied as he went back to his cereal.

"You…should probably not meet him. There would be a lot of questions," Jane said thoughtfully, "maybe you and Darcy could go do something in town?"

Darcy snorted. "What town? There's not much here. And the stuff that is here we've already explored."

Loki nodded in agreement.

"You could go bowling or something, I don't know. Just…it would probably be better for Coulson to _not_ know about Loki…" Jane replied, somewhat pleading.

"_No_," Loki replied sharply, "No bowling. I refuse."

Darcy giggled a little. "Don't worry, Jane. We'll stay out of your hair."

"Good. You should probably get going then. Coulson should be here in a half-hour and he's very punctual," Jane ordered softly.

Loki sighed, but got up when Darcy tugged on his sleeve and followed her to her room, where she collected her purse before latching onto his arm in order to lead him out of the complex and into the hot summer sun.

They walked in silence for a bit, wandering down the road into the center of the tiny town. Loki was surprised by his degree of relaxation with the whole thing. His brow furrowed a bit as he tried to figure out why he felt so at ease with Darcy, even though the girl was practically glued to his side on a hot summer day (and he had never liked to be in close proximity with people).

He supposed that Darcy was the closest thing he'd had to a friend in…ever, really. On Asgard he had always just hung out in the background of Thor and Thor's friends without making any of his own. But that still didn't explain the…attachment his subconscious mind had formed without his say-so.

In fact, Loki was beginning to notice a distinct feeling of happiness that would hang around in his chest whenever he and Darcy 'hung out' by themselves (and he was also starting to use the phrases Darcy seemed fond of). Loki shook his head, as If that could dispel this track of thinking that was starting to make him uncomfortable.

Loki decided to ignore the feelings that he couldn't interpret (mostly because he just didn't _want_ to interpret them) and focus on trying to have some kind of fun in this tiny town.


End file.
